Hold it right there.

I have nothing else to say. Truth be told, I'm worn out. Unexpectedly, I'm back here. Back to writing the depressing details of my disproportional life.

I don't know how to start. The last months were always about us. Every step forward or backward was always made with you. Everyday, as boring as it sometimes gets, was almost never without you. Every plan I may have tomorrow was build around us. Everything was You and I, together. But now without you, I have no idea where to start.

It was my choice, I know that. It was my choice to leave.

But that doesn't take away my right to feel. Many have this kind of relationship. And it won't be without having to go through the pain of remembering or missing. It's hard to get rid of this physical pain I'm feeling, denying I'm a few inches away from going totally sick, and craving to get my mind off things I wasn't supposed to think about. And to a point, I admit, I'm feeling a little lost. Confused, even. And sort of jealous. I don't know what's wrong. I just feel like something really big is.

I have forgotten to be strong. Without you it's just very difficult. You are the only person who always pushes me with encouragements and praises. You are the only person who makes me happy. You always believe I can be great at anything. How can I be that without you?

I would never wanna let go of you. I would never wanna let go of the dreams I have memorized in my mind about the life I dreamt of having. I love you. Sometimes, for the reason that are not convincing. Sometimes, for reasons that are too ideal. I love you. I think you know the rest.